How to Live

Why should we care about living well?

What else do you want beyond living well? Do you want to live your life by some borrowed purpose given by the society or any politicians of the country you happened to be born in? Or do you want to live by chasing some fancy dream or status that you have been conditioned to chase? Just think about it. This is your life and you know that it is the most important thing in the world. You surely don’t want to waste it, do you?

I am just requesting you to wake up and think generously and deeply before investing your life in anything. 

Maybe you are told to find some big purpose and you have been looking for that till now. You haven’t found that abstract and imaginary purpose yet, hence you’re carrying on with your life regardless. 

Ask yourself: Why do you need a big purpose to live? Is life itself not beautiful enough? 

Living is its own purpose. Live and live totally. And you’ll definitely do what needs to be done.

Or probably you want to do with life as everyone else is doing in the society. Before you follow any norm, you need to consider this: “Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to reform (or pause and reflect)” (Mark Twain).

Open your eyes and see what people have been doing and what they have gotten. Are they truly joyful, free, compassionate? Do you really want the same for yourself? Do you see the state of the world now and do you still find it aspirational? I am leaving this with you. I hope you don’t disappoint yourself. 

Or maybe you are fascinated by the philosophy of “going with the flow”. Fair enough, but my question is what if the flow you’re going with leads to hell and darkness and you find yourself in deep despair years down the line? You’ll be much older and carrying heavier baggage of frustration. You don’t want to waste years of your life on some nonsense you have been taught since you were born. So, please show some respect for your life and live deliberately.

Through this piece of writing I want you to stop where you are for a while and think through for yourself (I have got some purpose here serendipitously). 

What does living well mean? How does one live well? Let’s explore.

Are you living with awareness or just sleepwalking?

Without awareness, life is missed. Without awareness, you don’t live, you just sleepwalk through life- doing everything but not knowing what you are doing and why you are doing it. You do not realize anything truly, deeply to its core. Hence, you’re caught in a mundane circle and change seems impossible to you. Your actions are like throwing stones into the dark. 

Awareness is light that illuminates everything on your path. When you are aware, you learn from trial and error, you understand what’s working, what isn’t working. You know what you’re missing, and what needs to change. 

Awareness includes everything– yourself, your body-mind, thoughts, feelings, your surroundings and beyond. Self-awareness is part of it. You understand what you are. What do you really want? Do you want something just because others value it or do you want that because it’s an intrinsic part of your being? You understand what upsets you and why. What are your true values? 

And beyond everything when you’re aware, you are grateful for the truest blessings in your life. You never take anything for granted.

Awareness isn’t forced. It’s there when you’re simply watching and observing. When you catch yourself not being present in the moment, you are present; you’re aware. 

Questioning and writing are very useful for awareness. Question everything, write what comes your way, and write your observations; all this leads to awareness and self-understanding. 

You’ll never be this young again

If you ever feel like wasting time remember this quote: 

“Unfortunately, the clock is ticking, the hours are going by. The past increases, the future recedes. Possibilities decreasing, regrets mounting.” – Haruki Murakami

Yes, you’ll never be this younger again. Years down the line, you’ll give everything in your capacity to reclaim this moment, this age again. But a moment once gone past never comes back. You cannot go back in the past and live there. What’s gone is gone. And you cannot jump into the future and live there either; it’s not real. 

So what should we do about it?

Realise deeply that all you have is this: the present moment. Life is happening in the present moment. So, Live this moment totally. Live this day completely. Do what needs to be done now.

A moment lived totally doesn’t leave any residue. There is no baggage, no regret. Being true to yourself, you lived it well, you did what you could do;  You don’t do anything against your being. There is nothing to repent, nothing to regret, and nothing to worry about.

Let go of the past and let go of worrying about the future. 

Take care of today, the future will take care of itself. Seize the day, my friend.

What do you choose: Courage or fear?

A great life demands courage and resolve. Without courage it’s nearly impossible to do anything worthwhile in life. Without courage, you cannot have any virtue. You cannot do what is right. And without showing courage, you will not be able to realise your highest potential.

Our biggest responsibility is toward our highest potential. So my advice is: 

Live dangerously.

Have the courage to stand on your own feet, alone. Live on your own terms. Do what needs to be done, in spite of fear. Feel the fear, and do it anyway. 

When you face the fear, go deep into it, observe and understand it, you witness it going away. It’s mostly a mental hallucination, conforming to the miserable tendencies of the mind. 

Every great person you know has faced fear just like any other human, but they stood their ground. We also need to stand our ground and say yes to life, no matter what. 

If you truly respect your life, you cannot live in a box just to feel safe. Do yourself a favour and break the box that has been given to you by society or religion. Open your eyes and see there is no such thing as security in this world. Everything is temporary. It can all disappear very quickly.

We all are going to die. Death in this world is going to win anyway. Our only success is how well we live, while we are alive. So, choose courage. Live dangerously. 

Optimize your freedom and autonomy

The truest expression of ourselves can happen in freedom. We cannot realise our highest potential in bondage. Freedom is essential to knowing and doing anything worthwhile in our life. 

Freedom is basically freedom from conditioning. Freedom from dependence on borrowed beliefs and dogmas. Freedom from tendency to not be true to oneself  in order to just to fit in. Freedom is your ability to stand on your own feet alone. 

And the ultimate freedom–which can be considered as the highest form of evolution–is being able to say, “I don’t mind what happens. (famously said by Jiddu Krishnamurti)”. It’s an expression of selfless action (nishkam karma) or detachment from the result. It implies: not being upset psychologically about anything that happens in one’s life and beyond. It’s a state of being beyond disturbance of the world and its fragilities. 

Freedom is our goal. Your joy, your happiness, your worth do not depend on any outcomes. You are free. Just like the sun shines or a flower has fragrance, your actions are an expression of your being.  

We take everything too seriously. The world is too much with us. We can’t do something good because of despair or because our actions seem tiny in front of the entire world doing something antagonistic. We are frightened by so-called failures and judgements of people. We are frightened by loneliness. Hence, we accept being slaves to the opinions of people and we live in order to impress and fit in. The biggest favour you can do for yourself is this: Do not try to fit into a sick society, a sick system. Otherwise you will waste your life.

Just respect your life. Take complete responsibility for your life. Claim your freedom. Declare your independence from the opinions of people. And live to the fullest. 

Live authentically

Being totally honest with yourself and living authentically is the first step toward living a good life. No matter what your current situation is, just accept it totally. Once you honestly accept it, transformation begins on its own. You do what is required. This is simple. 

We make things complicated because we fool ourselves all the time. We explain away. We waste energy in justifying. 

The quality of life is when you don’t explain and complain. You just do what you want to do. 

What’s worth aspiring for?

Excellence in daily living. Yes, we need to move toward excellence. If you’re doing anything, you’re doing it totally. This is how excellence comes to life. 

For our actions, the ideal case is clarity; when there is clarity, there is no need for choice. Right action takes place on its own. The choice comes into the picture when you aren’t clear. Here, you need to choose what is more right or less wrong. Once you decide, you don’t go back and forth. You just move forward. You course-correct, as needed. As you move forward on the way, the way appears. 

Your actions and your behaviours are a reflection of yourself. So, whatever you’re doing, do it well.

Keep it simple

Simplicity is sophistication. Every time you aren’t keeping things simple, you are creating a problem, or a burden in your life. In your communications, in your relations, in your work, try to keep things as simple as possible.

Being simple is an arduous task. It doesn’t come easy. You have to watch, observe, and know yourself. You have to know the situations and simply do what’s appropriate in the moment. Keep your approach simple. This alone will resolve most of your unnecessary problems.

Fitness is a standard

How you treat your body-mind tells a lot about you. Fitness is a standard that speaks about you. If you have a little love and respect for yourself, you’ll naturally take care of your health and fitness. 

Remember, this human body isn’t everything but is a foundational vehicle that will make everything beautiful possible for you. Whether you aspire to liberation (Moksha) or worldly experience, this body is the vehicle. 

Once you lose health, everything else won’t make much sense to you. So do what is helpful to maintain good health. Sit silently. Relax. Exercise. Simple food. Proper rest. Hydration. Sunlight. And a proper diet that means you don’t put crap in your body and mind. That’s it. No big deal. 

To live well, we basically need a fit body, a calm mind, and some money for survival–through right livelihood. It’s basic. If you take care of it well- you can deal with other things well. Life is already so unprecedented, you don’t want to compromise on these basic things. I hope you do not disappoint yourself. 

Keep experimenting, exploring and learning

Limiting beliefs and knowledge are a hindrance to realisation of our highest potential and knowing the truth ourselves. Most of our knowledge is assumptions. See how much of what you know you really know. Test your beliefs and see how much of them is borrowed or tested by yourself. You don’t want to live your life on blind beliefs that usually breed illusions and disappointments. 

Think through for yourself. Take things as hypotheses and experiment with them. If you find something reliable, use it. Life has to be learned through trial and error. 

Being present to everything, you can see directly “what is” without having preconceived notions. Never be in a hurry to conclude. Once you do that you stop growing. 

We think we know very much, but in reality we don’t; we all need to keep learning all the time.  

Seneca said it beautifully: “As long as you live, keep learning how to live.”

Alright friends, think on these things and share your views.

Please take care and thank you for reading 🙂 

– Sandeep